i thought his name was warren

an open letter to the university of north carolina tar heels

thank you, boys, for such a wonderful year. thank you for surprising me, and delighting me, and being so amazing all year. thank you for beating duke, twice, and for all the immaculate comebacks, and even for the losses. thank you for the alley-oops to brandan, and the deep three pointers from the duke, and ty's amazing crossover dribble for the drive and the layup. thank you for the biscuits, and the blowouts, and the way the crowd in the dean dome sounds when you're up 2 or you're up 20.

and thank you, warren weston miller and reyshawn terry and dewey "biscuits" burke, for being such wonderful seniors, seniors like i haven't loved a senior since i loved george lynch when i was 13 years old. thank you for playing hard even as your minutes went down, and for playing hard even when you were sick, and for playing hard even when you spent most of the game on the bench. thank you, warren, for giving me a player to love like i love you, for your work ethic and your three point shot and your tiny, tiny height.

thank you, tar heels. thank you for giving me a team that i could love beyond belief this year. thank you for the joy, and thank you for the heartbreak -- a heart doesn't break like this unless you really love. this season was a hell of a ride, and since i can't drop the three ball from the outside, i can't say anything but thanks for everything.

next year's gonna be great.
  • Current Mood
    heartbroken but grateful
you wouldn't like him when he's angry

[yeah, so. did stanford deserve this bid? the answer is categorically no.]

so, stanford, last team into the field, 18-12, worst record in the tournament (even arkansas won 21 games; stanford is the only team with fewer than 20 wins), lost in the first round of the pac-10 tournament, totally unimpressive resume: currently down by 26 to louisville at halftime.

somewhere out there, i can think of (at least) five teams (let's start with syracuse & drexel, move on to air force & florida state, wrap-up with clemson) who are sitting in their hotel rooms, waiting to play their nit games, and being really fucking pissed-off right now. (or not drexel, who lost to nc state in the first round. they're sitting at home being really fucking pissed-off.)

and i can't say i blame them. (even people who get PAID to write about this shit agree with me!)

ETA: THAT'S IT, BOBBY KNIGHT, NO MORE TRUSTING YOU EVER. YOU GOT THAT? on the other hand: why on EARTH did i pick texas tech to beat georgetown in the second round? grad school makes me crazy.
you wouldn't like him when he's angry

[i emailed this to keri, but i forgot to share it with you guys.]

The Maternal Unit had the best line of the year about University of Florida coach Billy Donovan the other night. She said, "Putting Billy Donovan in a suit and letting him coach college basketball is like putting a tuxedo on a corn cob and inviting it to the Inaugural Ball."

This is why the Material Unit, as infuriating as she sometimes is, is totally my favorite. Also she spawned me, so I owe her.

In other ACC tournament news:

So far in the ACC tournament we've got: one bizarre collapse (Maryland); one bizarre call (the foul on Clemson at the end of their game); one really, really ugly coat (Sidney Lowe); one overtime game (Duke/State). It don't get better than this, kids. MAN. *thumbs up*

ESPN is comparing tournament bids to airline tickets or something? Apparently, Carolina is flying first class, VaTech, UVA and BC are flying business, Duke and Georgia Tech are flying coach, Florida State is on stand-by, and Clemson is stuck at security. I don't know. I just report what they tell me.

I was going to ask if Rick Pitino was the biggest douche in the NCAAs, but then I remembered we already have a consensus on that.
BC SUCKS.

[ah, march.]

march: the time of year when i stay up too late (gotta catch the pac-ten) watching players i've never heard of (could not name a single person who plays for almost anyone in the big east, except eric what's-his-face who plays for syracuse) play games i don't care about (st. john's/marquette). god, i love this time of year.

the pac-ten having a tournament: still totally weird y/n?
BC SUCKS.

(no subject)

i feel that it is appropriate to point out that, back in november, i picked virginia to finish third in the acc, and you scoffed at me. *buffs nails on lucky sweatshirt* (i also over-estimated duke, georgia tech, and florida state, and underestimated clemson('s early start), maryland, virginia tech and nc state. miami and wake ... are about where i picked 'em.)

front line reporting from the couch, during the carolina/georgia tech game:

minervacat: HEY, BOBBY IS STARTING TONIGHT.
onthecontrary: I SCREAMED. DID I KILL TY LAWSON WITH MY MIND?
... i'm gonna go study.

[rick pitino is old, and john calipari is fat.]

we're watching memphis @ gonzaga, and john calipari has gotten fat. FAT! he looks all pugdy and bloated! not sleek and polished and well-suited at all! this, combined with the fact that rick pitino looked old, wrinkly and exhausted and OLD, when i watched louisville beat pitt the other night, is blowing my mind. i thought the two of them were cyborg-men! i didn't think they could get old or fat!

V. CONFUSED BY THESE THINGS.

( in other news, please enjoy this photo of vanderbilt players celebrating post-victory over florida, captioned 'fine and vandy' by espn, from whence i stole itCollapse )